In this series we publish blog posts written by our first year undergraduate students for the PB101 Foundations of Psychological Science course. Here, Yvonne Yang explores our (sometimes obsessive) relationships with celebrities in the digital age. She considers why we develop these parasocial relationships, whether they can actually be good for us, and when it might be time to step away. 

Have you ever experienced celebrity rush? I was so obsessed with Taylor Swift that I know her favourite type of cake and the names of all her cats. This is exactly like a real friendship, even though I am fully aware that the persona will never know who I am. Sounds crazy? I am not alone. As this is very common among young adults, I’ m pretty sure that even if you didn’t have this experience yourself, you at least know one friend who is like me. This is what psychologists define as parasocial relationships.

What exactly is a parasocial relationship?

The concept was first established by two psychologists in 1956 under the background of the emergence of TV. They define the reaction of media users to the performer when they consider them as a conversational partner as a parasocial interaction, which would develop into long-term enduring relationships.

Now, with the internet and social media, it’s easier to form parasocial relationships than ever before. Instead of being classified as a type of mental illness, most of the parasocial relationships fall into the category of entertainment-social parasocial relationships. This means you may enjoy talking about the recent news and gossip of the Kardashian family, but you are aware that you don’t actually know them that well. It is just fun to chat about their family drama!

Photo by cottonbro studio from Pexels.

Just like how real-life friendships and relationships start, parasocial relations are built through interaction. First impression is important and this first encounter could be in any format no matter if it’s in a TV series or on a tube advertisement. As long as you have desire to learn more and an emotional bond that continues for a period of time, then a parasocial relationship is built. Take Beyonce as an example; if you regularly check her social media, feel happy for her when she is happy, and sometimes wish to ask her for advice, this is now a parasocial relationship!

Parasocial relationships are not only observed in celebrities, but they can also be formed with fictional characters like Harry Potter. Every child must have dreamed of receiving a Hogwarts letter from an owl when they were young.

Where do parasocial relationships come from?

It’s important to remember that humans are social animals. We have an innate ability and desire to develop and form interpersonal social connections for evolutionary purposes – a bigger tribe is easy to defend from animals. With more relatives and bonds, the collective brain will be enlarged to drive human evolution through culture. Media as a relatively new intervention throughout human history and has not yet had a huge impact on our evolution. Instead, the social characteristics we evolved to ensure the formation of interpersonal relationships have extended to the use of media.

One of these instincts is our predisposition to focus on faces and voices, especially familiar ones. In the absence of media, these features were exclusively associated with real-life interactions. However, with the rise of television and social media, the number of faces and voices we encounter has exploded. Our brains, not evolved to distinguish between mediated and in-person interactions, respond to both in similar ways. Basically, we treat the faces and voices we encountered through media as if they are real. This phenomenon gives rise to parasocial relationships – connections formed with media figures as if they were real individuals.

Thus, most scholars now agree that engaging in parasocial relationships (at least the first two categories) should not be considered an illness and instead it’s a new norm; most people who consume media tend to form a parasocial relationship of some sort.

Is it OK to be parasocial?

The short answer is, yes. As mentioned above parasocial relationships are mostly healthy behaviors and have a lot of positive impacts.

• Reduce loneliness

Since the parasocial relationship is very similar to the establishment of real relationships, it is a beneficial alternative to actual social relationships when feeling lonely or too stressed to handle. This is especially the case for people with obstacles in upbringing, for example, the LGBT+ population. Research has shown that LBGT+ adolescents report that their media personae act as an important guide for their difficulties in socialization. Parasocial relationship fulfil their need for an LGBT+ peer and reduce depression symptoms. In my own research, I’ve also found that homosexual readers of Boy’s Love subcultural form parasocial relationships with fictional characters and imagine rebelling the homophobic society with them. During the COVID-19 period, parasocial relationships worked as an alternative to real interactions as social distancing and chatting with friends and families turned online, blurring the lines between social and parasocial relationships.

Photo by Mikhail Nilov from Pexels. 

• Reducing stereotype through positive modelling

Parasocial relationships really allow us to observe and learn from people we admire, and this can have a significant impact on our stereotypes and attitudes toward things. For example, through a case study of the death of Robin Williams, people who had a strong parasocial relationship with him reported more willingness to help people with depression and reduced depression stigma. Generally, building a parasocial bond with a performer who is open about their mental health may, in turn, reduce stigma and prejudiced perspectives.

Even though most of the parasocial relationships are quite normal, some can be more extreme as well. For example, in 2022, one Japanese man married a Virtual Singer, Hatsune Miku, believing that she was his beloved one. It is important to distinguish between a celebrity crush and an intense obsession that they are your “only” friend or soul mate. Just like anything else in the world, parasocial relationships could be harmful when your love passes a limit.

Photo by mikoto.raw Photographer from Pexels.

Parasocial relations can be overwhelming and lead to loneliness and social isolation from building close bonds. There’s also research suggesting that parasocial relationships would develop uncontrollable addictive behaviours to social media. However, it is noteworthy that most studies are conducted in a Western background, indicating low generalizability to other cultures.

So, what should we do about this?

When you release signs like hard to focus on your daily work or losing your actual social relationships, then it may be time to break up, same as any toxic relationship in real life. You can do this by slowly pulling yourself out form the relationship; taking a break with social media and a deep talk with your love ones. Otherwise, enjoy this bond and attachment! Next time, when someone asks if you are in a relationship, you have another option: Yes, a parasocial relationship.

• This post was originally written as part of PB101: Foundations of Psychological Science, which is a core course on the BSc Psychological and Behavioural Science. It has been published with the permission of the author.
• The opinions in this post are of the author, not of the Department of Psychological and Behavioural Science or LSE.
• Cover image by Harian Nunes from Pexels.

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