Thursday 6 February is Time to Talk Day 2020, a chance for us to encourage open conversations about mental health and wellbeing, and eliminate stigmatised views. Student Ambassador Michelle Chingono shares her advice on the importance of why we should be more open and willing to talk with one another at LSE.
So, how are you?
No seriously. How are you, really?
The instant response tends to be “good” or “very well”. But, when was the last time you asked someone how they’re really feeling?
If it’s been a while, it’s #TimetoTalk.
The answer to “how are you, really?” can be harder than you think. We don’t always spell it out – but that doesn’t mean that we should be afraid to ask someone how they’re feeling.
Why do we say “I’m fine” when we’re not?
I never used to have the confidence to say how I felt. The words “emotionally drained”, “empty”, “anxious”, “stressed” and “worried” were often translated to “I’m alright” or “I’m just tired.”
You’d be surprised by how often we feel the need to falsify that all is dandy when it’s not.
Sometimes it’s an automatic, polite response and the social norm that we’re accustomed to, like avoiding prolonged eye-contact with the person opposite you on the Bakerloo Line.
“I’m fine” is a convenient answer, but the truth is, it’s a missed opportunity to understand each other’s state of mind and mental wellbeing where we can seek or offer support when it could be needed.
Talking about mental health is a great way to make sure that nobody feels alone and allows those struggling to realise that it’s more common than they had led themselves to believe.
A big challenge when it comes to mental health is the stigma that surrounds it.
It can go so far as to create a fear of sharing how we feel with our friends and family due to feeling embarrassed, or being uncertain about how they’re going to react, and how you’re perceived. For example, as weak, paranoid, or dramatic.
This can feed into a cycle of isolation, where you find yourself thinking, “am I the only one who feels this way?”.
Talking about mental health is a great way to make sure that nobody feels alone and allows those struggling to realise that it’s more common than they had led themselves to believe.
Moreover, talking about mental health can also educate others who may not fully understand the reality of it, and help them to feel more confident when supporting others around them who may be struggling.
A simple conversation when given the opportunity can help relieve some of the pain and feelings of isolation during a very difficult time.
Mental health problems don’t look a certain way
“I get up and go to work every day. I can still eat. I still go out with friends and smile and laugh – but why does that mean I don’t struggle with depression? What is it about me that doesn’t look like I have depression?” – Ellie Pool, Contributor at HuffPost.
Mental health doesn’t have a set or standard appearance, it portrays itself differently in each individual and each individual responds to their mental health problems differently.
I acknowledged this from my own experience in the middle of mock exams and assignments when I struggled to come to terms with the news that one of my parents had been diagnosed with cancer. I was going to lectures, graduate assessment centres, going out for meals with friends and getting on with my daily student life with a smile on my face, but my outer appearance didn’t match what was going on inside.
Anxiety didn’t look like collapsing with panic for me, and depression didn’t look like not eating normally, but it did look like constant outbursts of tears.
“Approximately one in four of us in the UK are currently suffering with some kind of mental health problem. When you think that 25% of us are suffering, how is it possible that all of our symptoms and signs of suffering would look exactly the same?” – Ellie Pool, Contributor at HuffPost.
It’s time to talk and give mental health a voice
The first time I fully opened up was with LSE staff and in Individual Counselling sessions delivered by LSE Student Counselling, who provided very helpful support and were so kind to me.
It was also my first time having counselling, at a point where I felt like discussing my problems with friends and family wasn’t enough due to the fear of burdening or worrying them.
The act of having an open conversation and talking about my mental health and wellbeing in a safe space had a big and positive impact on my life and my studies during a difficult time. At first, it felt like that moment when you ask a question in a lecture that you might think is too stupid to say out loud, yet you realise you’re not the only one wondering, and the question isn’t silly.
We all should be able to talk openly about mental health so that we can access the support we need when struggling, and support those around us. It’s in our power to help and positively change other people’s lives.
While we may not always have the best solutions or ability to relate to people who need help, it’s ok. The most important thing is that you:
- listen to them
- share your time whether it’s over text, at lunch or over coffee
- give care and compassion
The Time to Talk website provides very helpful tips and advice on how to do this and when is the right time and place to start the conversation.
Let’s push for change that encourages speaking openly and honestly about our mental health because talking about it can change lives.
The more open and willing we are to talk, the bigger the impact we can have on each other at LSE. Let’s keep talking. Today and tomorrow is a chance for all of us to be open, to talk, to listen and to change lives. You can start that conversation, it’s #TimetoTalk.
Let’s push for change that encourages speaking openly and honestly about our mental health because talking about it can change lives.
If you’re experiencing mental health problems or need urgent support, there are lots of places and people that you can go to for help:
The Student Wellbeing and Counselling Service:
Free and available to all LSE students, and also offers support on what to do if you’re worried about someone
- Website
- Email: counselling@lse.ac.uk
- Telephone: +44 (0) 20 7852 3627
NHS:
- Find local GP services
- Free expert health advice and information from NHS 111 by dialling 111
- NHS Mental Health and Wellbeing helplines
In an Emergency:
A list of where you can get immediate help from if you find yourself affected by mental illness at any time.
- If you or someone else is in immediate danger dial 999.
- The Samaritans – Dial: 116 123 (24/7 nation-wide freephone), Walk in Support 9am – 9pm, 7 days a week at 46 Marshall Street, W1
- University College London (UCL) Hospital – closest Accident and Emergency department to LSE
Telephone: + 44 (0) 207 387 9300 - NIGHTLINE – confidential listening, support and practical information service for students in London and Open University, open from 6pm – 8am every night of the academic term.
Telephone: +44 (0) 207 631 0101 or Email: listening@nightline.org.uk - CAM Crisis Messenger Text Service – free text service providing 24/7 crisis support across the UK, if you’re experiencing a mental health crisis and need support.
Text: CAM to 85258
